According to Everett Worthington Jr., the author of Hope For Troubled Marriages (InterVarsity Press, 1993), anyone of the following things indicates that a couple should consider seeing a counselor.

__ 1. Someone in the family is being physically or emotionally abused.
__ 2. Alcohol or drug dependency is part of the problem.
__ 3.Either of you is seriously depressed, or is having other serious emotional or personal problems.
__ 4. There are sexual problems which are placing a serious strain on your relationship.
__ 5. The problems between you have existed for a long time and seem to be getting worse.
__ 6. You have tried almost everything you know to help improve the relationship, but nothing has worked.
__ 7. Your children are frequently caught up in the middle of your problems or are suffering in other ways.
__ 8. Either of you thinks marriage counseling is needed.
__ 9. One of you has contacted a lawyer.
__ 10. One of you is having -- or has recently had -- an affair.
__ 11. Either of you feels locked in a power struggle you cannot resolve.
__ 12. Either of you is unable to forgive the other for some past transgression.
__ 13. Either of you is using outside activities (work, friends, other com-mitments) as an excuse not to spend time with each other.
__ 14. The tension in your relationship is increasing rapidly.

Catholic Charities
Lutheran Social Services
Family Service League.